Chronic Illness, Chronic Pain, Mental Health

Goals are overrated

Having a job can be a difficult task when you suffer from chronic pain. It may limit your abilities or prevent you from working altogether. Our dreams and career goals often get pushed aside, which can make us feel down and useless. But there is absolutely nothing wrong with having a different path than what you originally wanted to do, it doesn’t make you any less of a person.

Since October 2020 after a bad experience at the dentist which made me disabled, unable to start my first job since I graduated, I have not been able to work, I’m not able to drive, stand for long periods of time, or do too much physical activity, and I have to pace myself as much as possible. And unfortunately for me, most jobs in my field requires driving, lots of running around and rushing. Which I’m not capable to do anymore. This was a massive deal breaker for me. I had also put so much pressure on myself to get better… which is not what I needed. I needed to take my time, and do only what I can do. Once I stopped pressuring myself and listened to my body, I was able to go out more, be more confident and happy, and I decided to enjoy as much as my life as I could before I was ready to start work. I must admit it was a massive challenge, catching up with friends I haven’t seen for a while or meeting new people, because I always thought ‘what are they going to think, I live with my parents and I have no job, there is nothing going for me right now’. I soon found out that they didn’t care. When I say they didn’t care, I mean they didn’t care that I was having a break from work or still living with parents. My close friends know what I’m going through, and didn’t judge me (if your friends judge you for this… are they really your friend?). And in regards to meeting new people, I didn’t lie, but I didn’t necessary tell them the truth. I would always say stuff like ‘I’m having sometime off work for a bit’, I refrained from mentioning why and changed the subject. Because its really no ones business.

You are your own person, you have your own path, there is no time limit or age you must do something.

I eventually became a more positive person, I worked and I’m still working really hard on myself, because I have the time and its important for my pain, both physically and emotionally. I realised that there were too many triggers in the workforce, and too many things could go wrong. And that’s okay, because I matter more than money. If I went out into the workforce right now, there is so many things that could go wrong, the stressors on my body could cause me to have a stoke, faint, fall over and collapse ect.

One thing I did was stop making goals for myself, because honestly they are so overrated and not necessary. They are a set up for failure, and disappointment. Especially for us who struggle from chronic pain. I understand goals are difficult to remove from our mind, and we will probably always have them there, but stop writing them down, stop setting a time limit, and just live your life. Instead of making goals, work on believing that goals and dreams change, and that its okay if something didn’t work out. Focus on changing your mindset.

There is a reason why you can’t do what it is you wanted to do, and if you can’t do it, its not your time. You are still valid.

And it you do work with chronic pain, that’s great. When I was working, I still suffered from pain everyday. It was difficult, but I could manage, now I can do anything with Migraine, just not with my new diagnosis.

If anyone every tells you that you are lying or overexaggerating about your pain, because you are working, explain to them what invisible illness is. Its not fair that we have to be judged.


3 thoughts on “Goals are overrated”

  1. Really beautiful blogs Petrina!
    Deep, insightful and raising unapologetic awareness with every flowing word. Glad to stumble across your ‘work’ & be inspired by your Jounrey. Thank you, Reannon

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s